Last night, I came to a conclusion about something I've been wrestling with for a long time. I started writing when I was about ten. The only thing that's been with me, as consistently and even longer, has been a love for reading and a general obsession with storytelling. That obsession extended to film around the same time I started writing. I wrote stories, as well as journals and the like. I've continued writing, in different forms, all of my life. I've experimented with different kinds of writing along the way, and but it's been a regular part of my life, all of that time. It's a compulsion, if I'm honest about it. I've never fully understood why. I think I started, just because I wanted to participate in this thing that was so awe inspiring and wondrous to me. I wanted to be like my heroes, which is not at all unusual. Either I didn't really understand what I was responding to either though, was just too young, not yet mature and self aware e...
I've been thinking a lot about the way my autism has presented through the years, and how it affects/presents in social relationships. One of the things I've understood to be different about me from the overwhelming majority of people I've met and known, is a reduced interest in competing for social status. If I'm completely honest, the one thing I've ever really wanted, socially, is to get to just be a human being amongst other human beings. I can recognize that we may be different in a number of ways, but those have always registered as variations really, not differences . It's a significant part of what I do enjoy about socializing with other people, and I do enjoy meeting and getting to know new people. A significant part of my love for the arts has been the degree it engages me with the vast spectrum that is the human being. It's why trying to choose a "best" when talking about any number of different human endeavors and creations makes me ex...